You can call Miss Aubrey Vice and Mistress Haze playmates. But even with bunny ears on, they are no sweet-tempered things. Behind closed doors, the professional dominatrixes jeer and crack custom-made whips to inflict pain and shame.
During ‘double domination’, which is when the women partner up, clients typically request to be cuckolded. In the kink context, a cuckold is made to feel like they cannot satisfy their partner sexually and are ‘punished’ by being made to watch their ‘partner’ engage in suggestive acts with another. Conceivably, it is meant to deliver a double whammy of derision. “The mix of emotions between embarrassment and arousement can be very heady, especially for emotional masochists,” says Mistress Haze.
Usually men, clients may also be tied up shibari-style or spit-roasted, the sexual practice of being penetrated at both ends. It isn’t unusual that they be left in a corner and taunted for their loss of control.
A close friendship outside of work allows Aubrey and Haze to feed off each other’s energy, which keeps things fresh and unpredictable. Aubrey has always been a dominant. A taste of the “perversion of power” led her to “a point of no return” for as revels in taking control and catering to her hedonistic nature.
Haze started out as a submissive, but made the switch to a dominant following extensive exploration. She grew to prefer domination.
Double domination, however, is more the exception than the norm, so most of their services are carried out as individuals. These services include chastity play, nipple play, sensory deprivation, and obedience and slave training. As commonly depicted in pop culture, there is also a fair amount of whipping, caning and piercing.
The dommes make plain that while their services are inordinately carnal, they are not sexual in nature. “Even though I get paid, I still hold all the power,” says Aubrey. No bodily fluids are exchanged during her ‘play’ sessions. “I explicitly disclose my rules of engagement with all potential clients and do not do anything I am uncomfortable with.”
To minimise interactions with predators, they have in place a rigorous vetting process and submission of an enquiry does not guarantee admission. “Before a session, I spend a lot of time reading applications and engaging in negotiations,” says Aubrey. “I only take on a client if I’m 100 percent confident I can execute their requests safely, and that they will respect my limits.”
Precautionary measures include a ‘traffic light system’ to ensure that all acts are consensual, and that a client is comfortable at all times. Non-verbal cues are introduced beforehand if clients yearn to be put in situations in which they won’t be able to speak .
Carving out their own niches means the dommes specialise in different kinks. Haze’s forte is in fantasy wrestling. “My sub and I will ‘wrestle’, but we have an understanding that they will lose,” she explains. Her clients, she adds, typically take pleasure in the adrenaline rush of being “choked by strong thighs and the opportunity to be so close to me”. Simply put, they revel in the humiliation of losing to a woman.
Why do these men desire abasement? According to the women, they are essentially acting in retaliation towards the authoritative roles they have to assume at work and at home.
“They get to let go of all their vanilla responsibilities and feel free for a while. It’s a form of escapism and the only time they can explore their inner selves.”
The dominatrixes on men who take pleasure in subjugation
Given the degree of trust placed in them, Aubrey and Haze find their work to be deeply meaningful. “This is especially so if I’m the only one who can safely and confidently deliver experiences that satisfy their deepest and darkest impulses,” says Aubrey. Her best submissives are those she shares rapport with because it usually translates into a good time. Moreover, they tend to be more receptive to a wider variety of kinks.
Suffice to say, the hefty remuneration is a big draw. While the women decline to reveal their rates, Aubrey is able to afford luxury lingerie, shoes and bags. But there is also a bigger picture. “Like many Singaporeans who try to have multiple streams of income for retirement, my work as a professional dominatrix helps to meet that goal,” she says.
Both women hold day jobs, and because domming is their side hustle, how much they make corresponds to the amount of free time they have. They also keep this part of their lives in the shadows. “My biggest apprehension about telling friends and family would be the stigma associated with the practice. I am also concerned about the potential impact on my job,” reveals Aubrey.
It is as such comforting that their respective romantic partners are supportive of what they do. They are both in “switch relationships”, where partners take turns to be the dominant and submissive.
Interestingly, the dommes experienced a spike in demand for their services during the pandemic. Many of the Aubrey’s new clients were first-timers who had been fantasising about subjugation for a while. “They said that Covid-19 highlighted the unpredictability of life, so they decided to try it out. They didn’t want to regret not having done it at all,” she recounts.
They also observed a surge in clients in their 20s, an indication that Gen Zs are no less enthusiastic about experimenting with kinks. Even though the pandemic is over, demand has not slowed down.
But as in any job, they encounter their fair share of challenges. The biggest one is burgeoning competition—foreign dominatrixes have been making their way to Singapore to expand their clientele. That said, Aubrey and Haze are also free to tout their services elsewhere. “There are plenty of opportunities overseas. However, since I don’t do this full-time, I don’t feel any any pressure to do more. I’m happy to dedicate my time to my regulars,” says Aubrey.
Even the most zealous regulars take breaks from domination every once in a while, but the women reckon that it isn’t out of boredom. “You do not simply become tired of a kink if it is innately what turns you on. I’ve been leading the lifestyle for more than a decade and have been curious for even longer,” explains Aubrey. She adds that when clients outgrow the practice, it is usually attributable to life circumstances rather than kink fatigue.
That is not to say that clients don’t outgrow ‘serving’. Some people evolve to prefer spectating while others grow to enjoy dominating.
Neither woman sees themselves leaving the trade anytime soon. Haze foresees sticking it out for at least another five years and will only consider quitting if she is mentally exhausted or loses interest. Contrary to her kink persona, she lets on, she is pretty easy-going in real life.
What makes a good dominant? Apart from the ability to make sound decisions, they should be able to respond to unexpected situations. Also, an understanding of the motivation behind the services requested. “I’ve realised that the gap between fantasy and reality needs to be actively managed throughout the entire duration of engagement,” says Aubrey. “Submissives may say they want an intense whip-lashing after watching a hot video, but that doesn’t mean they can really handle it.”
She considers herself a therapist of sorts because she provides a safe space for clients to freely express themselves. Empathy, she adds, is a necessary trait in this line. “I go into every session knowing that my clients are seeking acceptance for their kinks. My job is to help them leave feeling lighter and happier.”
Style director: Chia Wei Choong
Photographer: Mun Kong
Videographer: Yvonne Isabelle Ling
Photography assistant: Melvin Leong
Hair & Makeup: Keith Bryant Lee
